The Shadow of a Doubt

I don’t tend to take people on their word.  Call it cynicism, skepticism, I don’t know.  But if I am going to believe something to be true, I need to get there by myself.  In fact, the easiest way to dissuade me from agreeing with you is to tell me that something is true without acknowledging other possibilities.  Don’t get me wrong, I rely heavily, if not solely, on what other people think, but I can’t just take something at face value and subscribe to it without asking some hard questions.

I kind of figure that lots of people have this same attitude, especially when it comes to faith, so when I got the opportunity to lead a college discussion on Sunday morning, I decided to talk about doubt.  Sure enough, it seems like many young people rely heavily on the process of doubting and asking questions in order to figure out what to think of God, their faith, Christianity, the church, and Jesus.

The problem is…that is a scary prospect for a lot of churches.  Especially if those conversations are endorsed by people within the church.  After all, aren’t spiritual leaders supposed to be leading young people toward God?  Now, the youth leader here was fully supportive, but for some It seems counter-intuitive to encourage students to ask questions like, “Why should I believe God loves us when I have seen so many horrible things in my life?” or “How do we know Jesus didn’t just say he was God’s son to make people listen to him?”  And so on.

What’s more, isn’t faith what you have when you don’t have to ask questions?  Doesn’t faith mean that you believe something whether you have any proof or not?  That means that doubt would really be the opposite of faith!  In fact, when Thomas doubted whether Jesus had really come back from the dead, didn’t Jesus say, “Blessed are those who believe without seeing me?”

Yes, he did.  But he also showed Thomas the holes in his hands and feet.  And then asked him to put his fingers in the holes.  And then included Thomas without question in a final meal of bread and fish with six other disciples.

What he did not do, was berate Thomas and cast him off into Hell for doubting.  Instead, he willingly showed the doubter proof, and then gently admonished him for questioning the word of his eleven best friends who he should have trusted more than anyone.  This happens a lot in the Bible:  someone doubts, Jesus (or God if it is in the Old Testament) gives them proof, and then they get on with their lives, feeling much more confident in their faith.

So, I wonder if doubting isn’t often a very healthy part of faith.  If doubting is simply the beginning of a conversation that will ultimately lead to stronger faith.  After all, we do not have a physical Jesus to show up and shove his hole-y hands in our faces, or a voice of God that speaks to us out of a whirlwind.  Instead, we have prayer, scripture, and the wisdom of a couple thousand years of people who have wrestled with these same doubts.

Maybe doubt is an inherent part of faith.  Which would mean that faith is much less an unquestioning adherence to beliefs, and much more a process of “sacred questioning,” as my mentor David Dark would say.  The “faith” part of it comes in trusting that God will take care of you through this process.

Of course, that is just one – very biased – opinion.

Are there times when doubting is unhealthy?

What happens if doubt ultimately leads someone away from God?  Does that mean it was wrong to doubt in the first place?

Sermon Numero Uno: Romans 12:9-21

I thought since I am currently delivering my first sermon ever, I would schedule the written form to go out over my blog simultaneously.  Ah, the wonders of technology.  Anyways, it is based in the text Romans 12:9-21, which might help to read first here.  Also, I apologize for editing mistakes, grammar, and the like.  I wrote it like I would speak it, so if it doesn’t sound right, just imagine Martin Luther King Jr. orating it, and it should sound better…

Good morning!  Paul says, “Contribute to the needs of the saints; Extend hospitality to strangers.”  As a stranger to ________, you have extended much more than your fair share of hospitality to me.  From the time Harold jumped up to greet me on my first Sunday here, through Vacation Bible School where the ladies welcomed me with so much excitement each day – I even arrived late to the Swiss Steak Dinner, and you still let me eat!  The church’s and Pastor ___’s willingness to include me in the work of the church for this month was an offering of acceptance that I think embodies the essence of hospitality.  From my experience, I would say that you all have set a pretty good example of the way Paul instructs us to be hospitable.

Continue reading

Livin’ On a Prayer

What does prayer mean to you?

Do you pray?

If so, to whom?

Do you offer gratitude, praises, apologies, supplications?

Do you get a response?

Do you think it causes tangible results or does it just make us feel better? Continue reading

It’s Alright to Be Little Bitty

It’s time to tackle the pint-sized elephant in the room:  This church I am working with for the month of August is tiny.  In fact, it’s so small that on July 1st it entered into a “cooperative parish” with another nearby church.  Basically, that just means that two small churches share one ordained elder who splits her time between the two congregations.  In theory, the churches should have joint committees and merged ministries and the like.  In practice, the two churches have yet to really integrate their organizational structure, leaving my pastor with twice as many meetings to attend, twice as many budget issues to deal with, and half as much sleep. Continue reading

Methodism 101

I have arrived in beautiful Lakewood, NY.  This marks the closest I have ever been to the Great Lakes – in fact, I pulled off the highway to see Lake Erie up close and personal.  Also, I didn’t think the change coming from Tennessee to New York would be an increase in trees, but I swear I have never seen such an endless expanse of forest as I did in the last 30 miles to Lakewood. Continue reading

An Embodied Faith?

Five days.  In five days, I set off for Lakewood, New York, for the first leg of my journey.  I can hardly believe that the crazy fantasy of one year ago has turned into a concrete reality.  In final preparation, I’m about to sell off all of my childhood belongings in a massive two-day yard sale.  Hopefully I won’t have a breakdown over the Pokémon and Pogs… Continue reading

Turn the News Back On

In the movie Blood Diamond, Leonardo DeCaprio plays a diamond smuggler in the bloody, war-torn terrain of Sierra Leone. When his American journalist/romantic interest counterpart asks how and why so much unconscionable violence – rape of women, mutilation of children, abduction of children as child soldiers – can arise in this part of the world, Leo coolly responds, “T.I.A. This Is Africa.”

That’s the attitude: Don’t try and figure it out, just accept it and move on. Continue reading